I started writing this blog right after I published my
last blog, but got side tracked and didn't get to finish it. I have gotten a few questions about my last blog. I didn't realize my tone was so melancholy yesterday, but I guess I was. Sorry, this is what's going on:
I have hit a snag in my life as a Mommy. I am in a seriously HARD season right now. I am in tears at the end of nearly every day and I'm counting down the seconds to nap time (if they even nap) and bed time. I hate myself for saying that, but its the truth, I just pray that I survive until bedtime. When I make it, I prepare myself for the next day.
Taelyn and Trent seem to be plotting against me and are finding ways to break me down. Taelyn is almost three and a half and Trent is almost two. So as Trent is about to enter his "Terrible Two's" stage, Taelyn is full into something I just found out about, which is the "Trying Three's" I have never heard of this, but nearly everyone I've talked to has informed me that three is MUCH harder than two. I gotta admit, I was thinking I escaped the terrible two's with Taelyn because she really wasn't
that terrible. I also just discovered that the reason they, (not that I know who "they" are) call it "the Terrible Two's" is because, at two is when it begins, it continues sometimes into four. (I'll die!)
I am completely unprepared for what is happening in our house. Taelyn is a good girl, (for the most part). She is obedient, sensitive, caring, and helpful. (When she wants to be) Recently, she hasn't been any of those great qualities that I love so much. Taelyn was always more than happy to help me around the house and with her baby, but lately, she has decided she doesn't
want to help me, she doesn't
want to mind me, she doesn't
want to eat, she doesn't
want to drink, she doesn't care that she pushed the baby and hurt his feelings. What happened?? It seriously was a change within one day. I really don't know what is happening, but I don't like it. She whines everything she says. Whining to me is like nails on chalkboard. It hits a nerve, I literally start to twitch. I HATE WHINING!!! Why can't she just tell me in her normal sweet voice what she wants? Its been awful, what's worse is that she has no regard for my feelings, she tells me and the baby to "Go away and leave her alone." She is
mean! I know she is a little girl and she doesn't mean what she is saying, but it really doesn't take the sting off of the things she says. She cuts me to the core. I have cried on many occasions, I really don't know what to do about this. I have tried EVERYTHING! She is a very willful child.
With Trent, I am having much different issues. My day with him consists of me protecting him from killing himself. I wish I were joking. He runs face first into the wall and thinks its funny! He jumps from the highest place he can climb and does nose dives. He climbs EV-ER-RY-THING!!! He has scaled the side of our stairs, climbed bookshelves, I catch him on top of tables, counters, chairs, you name it, he's climbed it. Trent gets into everything, he may think his name is "NO" because I say it a million times a day. Just this morning, I was doing Taelyn's hair, I have all of her colorful bands in a medicine container, nice and color coordinated in the separate compartments and he somehow he got a hold of it and emptied ALL of the bands onto the floor. Seriously, there were about a thousand bands on the floor. (That is NOT an exaggeration!) While Taelyn and I picked up the bands, Trent got into our dresser drawers and emptied out all of our clothes, then left the drawers open like stairs and climbed to the top of the dresser, I got to him just as he was about to make a dismount to his demise. As I'm scolding him, this little crazy has the nerve to grab my cheeks and laugh in my face, as in, "Look at me Mommy, I don't care that I scared you half to death, its FUNNY, you can't see that its funny, I'll hold your face in front of mine so you can see how funny I am!" I am NOT amused! Oh, but wait, there is more... As I'm folding our clothes and putting them back into the drawers, I hear Taelyn say, "Don't do that, baby, you gonna get Mommy upset." With a knot in my stomach, I run back to bathroom, to see that he has emptied an entire bottle of baby oil onto the floor and was sitting in it and rubbing it all over his hands, body and the floor . One might ask, why don't I have child proof locks to keep him away from these things? I do! he's mastered opening them! Apparently, they aren't very childproof. (I tried uploading a video of him opening cabinets, but it wouldn't work.) This was just this morning and BEFORE 7am!
I know that God will not give me more than I can handle, but boy, oh boy, I certainly have my work cut out for me. I pray myself through my day. I pray over the kids when they are acting up, especially for Taelyn and her fits. I pray that God surround Trent with a protective force field because I just know a trip to the ER is right around the corner with the shenanigans he pulls all day long. I know, this is just a season and it will pass, I know, things could be much worse, my problems are miniscule compared to what is going on in the world right now, everyone goes through things like this, many other mothers do this everyday, my problems are not
that bad, but hey, they are my problems, and this is my blog, so I will complain if I wanna!
PS, I know they will probably read this one day and I hope they do. I want them to know I struggled and survived and did a great job, (wishful thinking, here)
